Category: Funny

Cucumber in rear was ‘failed suicide bid’: A HONG Kong man, taken to the hospital to have a cucumber removed from his bottom, told doctors he inserted it in a suicide attempt.

The Sun reported Chin Wei, 62, said the method was a variation of the Japanese ritual suicide hara-kiri – usually carried out with a sword plunged into one’s own stomach.

He was found in a pool of blood by his daughter before being rushed to receive medical health. Medics said a severe tear to the man’s anus was not life-threatening.

Yes, that’s a ball-point pen….

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Four students who posed for photos with a human placenta have been kicked out of a suburban Kansas City nursing program after at least one of the placenta pictures was posted on Facebook.

Now one of the students, Doyle Byrnes, is seeking a temporary restraining order and a preliminary injunction in U.S. District Court in Kansas to force Johnson County Community College to reinstate her before classes resume Jan. 19.

The Kansas City Star reported that Byrnes and several other students were attending a lab course off-site at Olathe Medical Center in November when one of them asked a nursing instructor for permission to photograph the placenta so they could share the experience on Facebook.

The lawsuit against the college and several of its employees said that the nursing instructor responded, “Oh, you girls,” and did not tell them not to do it or that it could result in discipline.

Thousands of angry iPhone users overslept and were even late for work and flights yesterday after a New Years Eve software glitch cancelled the phone’s alarms.

The iPhone’s non-recurring alarms stopped working for a staggering two days after the clocks struck midnight to usher in 2011.Instead, thousands of smart phone owners got a surprise lie-in and many were forced to blame the glitch for being late for work.

The bug was the latest in a series of embarrassing blunders for Apple after the iPhone failed to cope when the clocks went back one hour on October 31. Phone chiefs have promised the phone will automatically rectify the bug today just in time for when millions of people across the world return to work after the festive break.

An outpouring of online anger ensued as people bemoaned missed dates, turning up late for work or missing that annual ‘happy new year’ phone call to loved ones.

Dan Linfoot wrote on Twitter: ‘iPhone alarm didn’t work today! Slept in by 15mins.’

Matt Burfield wrote: ‘Why the hell did my alarm not go off on my iPhone? Arggh’

Flight attendant Fion Chan wrote: ‘Luckily I managed to wake up on my own. I don’t want to lose my job on the first day of the year.’

Jayne Hoskins wrote: ‘Can anyone shed any light on the iPhone alarm not working since new year?? I’ve just over slept by 2 hrs??’

Footballers Rio Ferdinand and Robbie Savage, who are followed by hundreds of thousands on Twitter, issued warnings to their followers yesterday about the alarm error.

Similar problems affected iPhone users in Australia and New Zealand in September, causing their alarms to go off an hour early in the southern hemisphere.

Apple issued a statement advising many of its phones would not work at the start of 2011 but the warning was missed by its thousands of customers.

The glitch effected non-recurring iPhone alarms which stopped working for devices running iOS 4.02, 4.1, and 4.2.1.

An Apple spokesman said: ‘We’re aware of an issue related to non-repeating alarms set for January 1 or 2. ‘Customers can set recurring alarms for those dates and all alarms will work properly beginning January 3.’
It is unclear what caused the alarm to fail, but technology experts say it could be due to a bug in the iPhone 4’s operating system.

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